Friday, 26 October 2012

Forever the bad guy...!

Yes, that's right I am the bad guy yet again on Y!A, may favourite place to see insults flying about, rudeness and offensive comments being made.  The latest thing to set me of into a major vent is to do with a question I asked;_ylt=AuOIk5uF1yr8QXGS4PKLgvwgBgx.;_ylv=3?qid=20121026033018AAMuCkG

What 'kicked it off' this time was me responding to somebody about another person's answer.  The answer that started it was:

"It's a tabloid. 99% bs. How anyone can believe them is beyond me. Same goes for biased websites. Now give me an honest newspaper and an unbiased website, and I'll read all tge stuff for and against adoptions."

The article I linked to my question came from the Daily Mail which just so happened to be the first online paper  I read that morning.  The person who picked up on the answer pointed out that the article was also in The Telegraph which is a reputable newspaper which I used to read regularly but it is pro social workers.  Although it can be argued there is nothing wrong with that.  However British social workers have a bad reputation for snatching children who should remain with their parents and not taking the children who should be removed from their parents.  I will always stand by one abused / dead abused child is one too many.  This doesn't excuse social workers not returning children to their parents when it has been proven the parents are innocent.

She also asked if I was going to block the person who gave the answer which I have.  I pointed out in my response to this person that the one who gave the answer has this included in her 'About me':

'As for blocking people, I only block worthless people.'

This person blocks everybody who disagrees with her which includes me so I said  I wondered we she had answered my question when I am a worthless person.  Even though I suffer with low self esteem and little confidence I know I'm not worthless. I simply blocked this person because when she has answered my questions she has been rude.  Blocking her doesn't stop here reading my answers but it stops her giving rude answers to my questions which usually don't answer my question either.  I find this disruptive and pointless.

Another person took it into her head that I was being spiteful based on my comment.  I don't know why she couldn't have just asked me instead of assuming I was just being spiteful.  I chose to ignore this comment:

"@Pip: How very sad you would "block" someone just because you do not like their answers. Did I say that I was the only one. No I just brought up an alternative way to look at the situation other than automatically jumping to the conclusion that the adoptive parents were automatically at fault. As for you and Frockney blocking me, go ahead. It will only prove that you do not have the courage of your conviction or and the ability to defend them. Ahhhh ain't censorship grand."

I don't block people because I don't like their answers as I usually ignore them.  Sometimes I report answers if they have been exceptionally rude / offensive / attacking.  I only have one person blocked and the others are multiple accounts owned by one person who is a troll.  I haven't block this person  as her remark was juvenile and jumping to conclusions.  I have relatives and friends who have adopted who are decent people.  I don't even lump all adoptive parents together on Y!A as most are decent people.  There may be times when I may disagree with them but I still respect them as they are decent nor do I expect them always to agree with me either.  With regard to the article I wasn't even blaming the scam for being victims.  I actually felt sorry for them.  What some people were missing the point on was that a baby was involved in the scam.  The article was based on how it affected the couple without a thought for the baby.

I also received a message from the same person who made some awful assumptions about me yet she should know me better from my answers on Y!A.  I will comment be some of the comments:

Maybe I wouldn't be so "madly" pro-adoption if you would realize that not all people aren't meant to be parents. ~  I have never, ever said that all parents who have children are meant to be parents.  Maybe this person is blinded by the fact that when I say that I also say there are adopters who should never had been allowed to adopt.

I don't even know why I am trying to explain this to you since you are so wrapped up in your own tragedy you can't see anything else but that. ~ I'm not wrapped up in my own tragedy.  It is a reality and a fact that should never have happened in the first place.

I really wish you would spend some times with some of these children, learn what real abandonment and fear is. ~ This is in reference of children who have been abused.  I have spent time with children  that have been abused.  One includes a 9 year old child who was abused by a babysitter.  Why this person should assume I have never spoken to an abused child is beyond me.  If she had asked politely she would have got a less heated response back from me.

I use to feel sorry for you..even though I thought you bore some responsibility..but now I don't. ~ I don't want her pity and have never wanted anybody's pity.  All I have ever wanted is for people to believe me.

You have revealed yourself to be as spiteful as anyone else. ~ I wasn't being spiteful and explained in my message why I blocked the person.  The person I blocked has made my life a misery for months by calling me a liar, repeatedly tells me she doesn't believe my story and has even accused me of being a troll with multiple accounts.  Every time I have politely defended myself only for her to turn it back on me and say I started it.  She has made a good job of playing the victim despite being picked up bullying me in the first place.  So, I have been put in my place like a naughty little girl that people can be spiteful towards me and I'm expected to rollover and take it.  Like a naughty little girl who is strong willed I shall carry on defending myself. 

I told you once before to seek help and to learn about forgiveness before it ate you up but you haven't. ~  Some people can be so arrogant.  She is not qualified to tell me to seek help which I did long before I ever went onto Y!A.  The counsellor I saw told me she learned from me on how to help mothers who have surrendered.  I gained far more from other mothers who have surrendered.  They were the ones who helped me learn how to cope and that it is okay to talk about my experiences.  Unfortunately some people want to shout me down and stop me from talking.  I don't understand why they see me as a threat.  It's acceptable for them to speak of their experiences so they should respect my right to speak as well.  My parents did a good job on me to silence me for 23 years.  Subsequently it took time for me to sort my head out.  I refuse to be silenced by faceless strangers who have crossed my path on the internet.  She also chooses to ignore the fact that I have publically forgiven those who have hurt me.  I asked her in my response whom I am supposed to forgive.  Not surprisingly I haven't had a response back nor go I expect one back.  What can I expect though from someone  who doesn't know me, hasn't got a clue what she is talking about and yet thinks she knowa me better than I know myself?
 Do you really think it is healthy to pick at your wounds every single day, over and over and over? ~ Sharing my experiences isn't licking my wounds, it's telling it as it is.  I might even educate someone along the line and it may encourage someone to parent instead of surrendering.

Get help Pip because whether or not you know it or realize it, this site is making you sicker. ~ This just made me laugh; if this is the best she can do then she obviously can't think of a good reason to warn me off.  


  1. Why is it that adoption trolls never acknowledge the abuse that goes on in Foster Care and adoptive homes, or how damaged these kids are due to adoption and foster care. So many should have been raised by their family, not drug up by some AP.

  2. I've since had an apology which shocked me ::)